That’s Right- My Mamma Mia Review Is Number 1 On Google.

Beth October 15 2008 Humor 10 Comments

But first, I must explain how my review of Mamma Mia popped, (pun intended, keep reading), into the grand ol’ position of numeral un, (that’s French for one). See the quote at the bottom of the post? The quote that made me snort in laughter when Meryl Streep’s character uttered the phrase? “I won’t be muscled out by an ejaculation.” Apparently a lot of people around the world simply need to know the exact wording- or, something, (part of me really does not want to know why they’re searching). I was looking at my stats and I saw an unusual number of hits coming from google.co.uk with the search phrase, “I won’t be muscled out by an ejaculation mama mia.”–104 to be exact today alone-from Great Britain. I dug deeper and counted 86 coming, (notice all the puns, I’m cracking up here people), from the US, (my stats cut off at a certain number and I don’t have an accurate count).

So, this may not be exciting to some, but I have never been number ONE on Google for anything. I’ve been number 3- I thought this was an achievement- but, no, I’ve hit the big time. I think this deserves a congratulatory email from her people to my people, my people, of course being me, or an autographed picture. I mean come on-now people will know the correct quote because of me. Jesus, I feel as if I just won an Oscar for Best Blog Post With An Ejaculation Quote.

“I would like to thank God, for hopefully not sending me to hell for thinking sexual innuendo is funny, my mother for clearing her throat when I casually slipped the quote into a conversation we were having and her saying, “Beth Michelle, (which is what she calls me when she’s surprised, mad, etc., at something I’ve said and/or done which is quite a bit), did you just say what I think you said?” and last and certainly not least, Meryl Streep, my favorite actress, (note the sucking up, although she is my favorite), for making me snort with laughter and almost famous on Google. You like me, you really, really like me.”

Ok, a little overkill but the entire thing is hilarious. Oh- and if anyone knows her people- tell them to contact me via this blog, you know, the one making the line from the movie even more known without intent.

So, Beth. You’re Almost 36, What Do You Plan To Do For The Rest Of Your Life?

Beth October 14 2008 Life As I Know It 8 Comments

I asked myself this question last night when I crawled into bed. Those of you who have remained readers of my little blog, know, that I, although intelligent, charming and fiercely strong-willed, have the worst luck when it comes to, well, life in general. Sure, I whine, moan and complain about every job I take-yes I’ve had quite a few, and become irritated when I don’t hear from jobs I’ve interviewed for and blaming the “idiots,” as I’ve deemed them all, for not seeing my potential. I’ve realized: I have no one to blame but myself. I never followed my dreams.

I now know I forced myself to be a computer geek, mostly out of frustration and the lack of not having anything better on life’s agenda. Don’t get me wrong-I like techie talk, solving problems and the almost instant gratification when I get it right. But the “geek” isn’t completely me- it’s only one, small gear revolving in my mind. I wrote several posts about wanting to be a journalist when I was in high school and not following through, mainly due to what I felt at the time were family obligations and the one four-letter word we never want to say- fear.

When I was little, I sang, I danced, (my poor parents were forced to watch my one woman talent shows consisting of me standing on a table, curtains wrapped around me, waiting for my mother to “introduce” me and getting pissed if she didn’t do it correctly), I read, I wrote, I told stories. I was creative- I had an imagination- for God’s sake I’m an only child, I had to have something to do, although I’m almost certain when I tell people I had “tree friends,” and yes I spoke to them on a daily basis, they either think I was a child prodigy who never fully developed her talents, or, I needed Prozac at a very young age. My mother recently told me she wished she could have done more to get me involved in the Arts-but living in Charleston, West Virginia in the 1970s, the resources weren’t available and parents didn’t just whisk their kids off to New York. Besides, I don’t blame her. We had no clue our lives would be turned upside-down when my dad died. That’s called life and we dealt with it-and are still dealing with it the best we can.

I started this blog after losing the one job in life that I loved and a relationship ending. I considered it a way to occupy my time and blow off steam. However, throughout these 4 years, I have realized something-I love to write. Whether I’m telling one of my many redneck/Wal-Mart/West Virginia stories, or about my own, sometimes, ok always pathetic ways of dealing with life, (tell me, how many people do you know who actually taped a panty-liner to their foot after cutting it during a pedicure mishap?), this blog is my way of entertaining others-just as I did when I was three. People comment, or email, telling me they liked this post, or that post, or my writing style in general-albeit I haven’t a clue as to what style it is-and I feel as if I’ve accomplished something.

If you’ve read this far, you’re probably wondering where this is leading. In a nutshell, I’ve decided I want to write. No, I’m not going to go all crazy, quit working for money and glue myself to the PC. Give me a little credit. But, I now know, actually, I believe I have known it all along, I should have followed my heart. Maybe my odd penchant for notebooks and pens was a clue. I have stories to tell. People, places and circumstances ready to make their debuts. Some of you will laugh and think I’m totally nuts. But, remember- the four-letter word we’re all unwilling to say? Fear, was it? Absolutely I have doubts and fears-but, I can, at least, admit to them.

Movie Review: Mamma Mia-We’re All Dancing Queens.

Beth October 6 2008 General Ramblings 21 Comments

Mamma Mia Movie Poster **Update: I am now officially obsessed with this film. I haven’t been so into a movie since, oh, yeah ok it was Grease and I had to put on shows for my mom and dad. Being 35, I think my mother would put me into a “special home” if I made her come here so I could sing and dance along with the movie-therefore I’m not even going to ask.**
Since the tender age of 2, I’ve had a love for anything musical. I used to gather my dolls and stuffed animals around me, make my mom put a Disney record on the turntable and I would perform while standing on the coffee table for my “audience.”

Let’s get one thing straight-Charleston, West Virginia isn’t a mecca for the theatre and aside from taking ballet/tap from the ages of 2-almost 5, voice lessons at 10 and a horrid year of theatre as a sophomore in High School, my fantasies of being a great stage and screen actress have been limited to my semi-obsession with movies and musicals. I haven’t felt this little spirit inside for years, that is, until I watched Mamma Mia! The Movie.

Starring Meryl Streep, Pierce Brosnan, Colin Firth, Julie Walters, Christine Baranski, Stellan Skarsg�rd, and newcomer Amanda Seyfried, the movie is loosely based on the songs of ABBA, telling the story of a girl trying to find her dad before her wedding. This is as much of the plot I will give away-no pun intended. What I will say- I adored Mamma Mia. Not since Grease have I watched and re-watched, (for clarification, no I didn’t see it in the theatre because no one would go with me to see a “musical”-but I had connections I wasn’t aware of and well, let’s just keep it at that), scenes just to sing along. A huge majority of so-called critics hated the film version, mainly because the actors are generally not known for musical performances, or have the greatest voices for this type of genre. Guess what? I don’t care, and neither have the millions of people who saw the movie, yes it’s a chick-flick, so mostly women. It’s a fun, care-free 90+ minutes of woman power. (References of Aprodite, the Greek Goddess of Love, should give you a hint). Movies don’t always have to be serious, prominent works of “art” in order to gain acceptance of an audience and I think the critics were proved wrong-the film, is the 60th highest grossing of all-time and it was just released in the US in July. You walk away feeling as if you can do anything-that you can be a Dancing Queen.

Though I was just a tot when ABBA reached their peak of popularity, I have always enjoyed their music, the geek that I am. Most of the songs are in the movie-you can see the list in the IMDB.com link I provided above. Meryl Streep steals the movie-proving she really can do anything. (Not since Out Of Africa have I enjoyed her, I did like The Devil Wears Prada, but let’s face it she was a witch, albeit brilliant). Although the movie, (and musical), is primarily aimed at those who were old enough during the ABBA years to understand the music, I think women, (and girls), of all ages will enjoy it. Sources around the Internet state a mid-December DVD release-and this is one I will be adding to my collection.

Favorite quote from the movie said by Meryl Streep’s character: “I won’t be muscled out by an ejaculation.”

Attention All Legitimate Looking Spammers.

Beth October 3 2008 Blogging 13 Comments

I believe in the Do-Follow movement. However, in comments, this is becoming a huge problem, especially on this blog. I am not in the business to give you free advertising for your store, products, or services. I’m glad you read my blog- really and most do contribute in commenting. However, from this date forward I will delete any links pointing to specific pages on blogs and regular websites. See the boxes on the sidebar? If you want your products advertised, hence possibly raising your PR, (I personally don’t care about PR any longer), you can either purchase a one month 125×125 ad spot for $10, or, go through Project Wonderful and pay depending on the bidding, which does not go above .50 cents a day. (The average is .20 cents depending on who is bidding and the spot). These spots are no-follow-this is my decision. However, think of it this way, if you truly want product/service/blog exposure, this little ole blog still receives 1000 hits a day and oddly enough 208 feed readers even though I haven’t updated much since April. I’m always open to negotiation of prices and I’m not difficult to work with. Your choice- face deletion, or advertise the honest way.