You’re sitting at a red light, look in the rear-view mirror and see a mini-van (which has seen better days), with not only a Christmas Tree strapped to the top, but a dead deer. Yes, folks in blogland around the world, it’s Buck Season in good ole’ West Virginia, or as I like to call it, Men Who Hide Themselves From Animals So They Can Kill Them and then Drink Beer season. The odd thing about this sighting though, (I was near Wal Mart so maybe it isn’t all that odd), is that a woman was driving the mini-van. I saw kids in the back but no male with an orange vest. Maybe Joe Bob was too drunk to remove his prized kill from the top of the vehicle before sending his wife out to get a tree. Why, oh why, can I not find a man of such caliber?
‘Tis The Holiday Season…
I really do not like this time of year. As I’ve become older, for me, the season has become a symbol of loneliness and my status on both sides of the family. I have never taken another person to a family holiday gathering. On my mom’s side of the family I am the outcast. Each year I feel more left out, more alienated by the people I share ancestor’s with. Actually, this is how I think of them. I don’t think of them as family-I think of them as people who happen to share a common history. No one has known total loneliness until they have been at a family gathering of close to 50 people, walked outside for 30 minutes while presents were being opened, and no one noticed you were missing. I know the season isn’t about getting things. It’s about sharing with friends and family. However, when you walk away with a box of candy, cheap earrings and bath gel from Wal Mart-you realize no thought was put into the purchase of your gifts. Every gift I have ever bought has had the person in mind. Lip-gloss for younger cousins, or, the rocking chair I bought my mom 2 years ago, I have thought about the person. It’s too bad this side of the family thinks I’m a spoiled brat who gave my mom more grief than she needed after my dad died. I’m sorry they believe this. They have never bothered to see what I went through, to see my pain, to reach out without making a false accusation. The one thing I did wrong with this family-is be born. Literally. All of you have missed out on knowing a great person.
My dad’s family, the few who are left, well, I don’t see or talk to them either. One cousin, Christie, is the only one I really keep in contact with. She’s more of a sister than a cousin, which I suppose, is a good thing. As the years have passed, the family has grown apart. Out of the 8 kids in my dad’s family, 5 remain. Two are in Florida, one in Texas. One aunt and uncle always say “you never call or come over.” I haven’t seen your number on the caller ID or your car parked in my driveway either. It works both ways.
Then, my so-called “new” family. My mom and her man-friend, his mom, one of his sisters and her husband and one of his brothers are the only ones I can handle being around. I can feel the tension when his kids are around-jealousy-get over it. I’m not taking anyone from you. You treat your father like total crap and only come around when you need something. Live 17 years without a dad and see how that feels. Maybe you would appreciate the sacrifices your dad has made for you even though all of you are spoiled, inconsiderate brats. I know you don’t care for me. The feeling is mutual. I would rather not spend my time around people who pretend to be one type of person but others can clearly see they are another.
Now that I have ranted on why I don’t like this time of year, I will say, there is something magical, even at the old age of 32. To stand outside, almost always in the cold, and hear the silence, knowing around the world for one brief moment, we’re all one. For those of us who celebrate the birth of Christ-whether we believe he was actually born on this day or not.. we’re all one. Every year since I was about 12 I have opened a window or a door and just listened. I’ve never let anyone in on this little secret of mine-most think I’m nutty anyway, why push it. Try it. Maybe you’ll feel the same magic as I.
An Aesop Fable.
I use stumbleupon (extension for Firefox) to find interesting websites. I found one with a few Aesop Fables. This is my favorite.
The Bear and the Two Travelers
TWO MEN were traveling together, when a Bear suddenly met them on
their path. One of them climbed up quickly into a tree and
concealed himself in the branches. The other, seeing that he
must be attacked, fell flat on the ground, and when the Bear came
up and felt him with his snout, and smelt him all over, he held
his breath, and feigned the appearance of death as much as he
could. The Bear soon left him, for it is said he will not touch
a dead body. When he was quite gone, the other Traveler
descended from the tree, and jocularly inquired of his friend
what it was the Bear had whispered in his ear. “He gave me this
advice,” his companion replied. “Never travel with a friend who
deserts you at the approach of danger.”Misfortune tests the sincerity of friends.
